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You Are More Than A Body - Bind Yourself to Your Source

By: Laurie J. Brenner

At 17 I worked full-time in a nursing home as a nurse’s aide. Populated with people in their later years, most lived out the rest of their days at this small convalescent hospital in La Mesa, California.

I worked the graveyard shift, 11 pm to 7 am. Standing nearly 5’11” and generally not afraid of too much, I worked this shift with three other women, all of them older and wiser than me. Older, big and black, not-intimidated-by much they each in their own way took me under their wing and taught me my work.

We would do our runs every two hours starting at the end of the hall and working back towards the nurse’s station.

Very early this fall morning, at about 3:00 am, it was time to turn my patients, check catheters and force fluids on anyone awake.

I pushed my cart piled high with incontinence pads, towels and other implements to the end of the hall and ducked into the ward on my left. Each ward contained four beds.

These wards housed patients unable to communicate. In this particular ward, each patient contained a tube inserted through their nose into their stomach for water and food.

I felt sad for these women as I could never tell if they knew what went on about them.

Bedridden, bedsore, generally pretty stiff and locked into fetal positions on their sides, the patients lay as eerily quiet as the room.

I entered the ward and immediately felt drawn to the second bed over on my right. The small light over the bed cast a cone of light directly over Ellie’s head. A small woman with short salt and pepper hair and drawn into the fetal position on her right side, I knew I needed to turn her over.

Unconsciously I pushed the cart to my left as I approached her bed. I felt drawn to just look at her. It felt like I just entered a church. A deep peace and quiet lay upon her. Standing, she would only be about 5 feet tall and couldn’t weigh more than 80 or 90 pounds soaking wet. A light sheet and blanket covered her.

As I looked at her – my eyes were drawn to her feet. I can’t tell you how, but something inside of me just knew to watch and it very gently took over and directed my gaze. I noticed something moving under the covers by her feet so I focused my attention there.

I watched a ripple move from her feet up her body, moving slowly but steadily. I say ripple because it felt non-violent. It was an effect and a cause in one fluid steady movement.

I watched as this ripple crested her torso and seemingly disappeared, but in exact timely fashion of the ripple itself, exited the crown of her head as a spiral of wispy cigarette-like smoke. It twisted gently up in a corkscrew manner, intent clearly defining its purpose and disappeared into the singular cone of light above her head.

I can’t say that I felt surprise. Something inside me knew. The timing of the whole incident, complete with me pushing the cart aside, gently walking over to the end of her bed, and putting one hand on the footboard couldn’t be more exquisitely timed if it had been scripted.

The moment I hit the mark, the movement began.

While it happened, I felt no fear. The moment I realized her death, reality crashed in on me. She died, I saw it. More importantly, I saw her spirit exit quietly and gently with a singular and intent purpose: it knew where it headed. I felt the intelligence, I felt its awareness of me, and I felt its total lack of gender.

None of these things bothered me.

What bothered me: where there was one – there were many.

AT 17, fright came from my logical leap and I scurried out of the room like a child running from pretend monsters.

I went through the hall to find one of the big black sisters I worked with. I ran to her and clung like a child in need of protection.

She ambled her way down the hall with me in tow. I stayed behind her and used her body as a shield and we entered Ellie’s room. She checked her pulse, noted the time, and listed her as dead.

She pulled Ellie’s few belongings from the night stand drawers and placed them on the bed with her. She covered her head.

We closed all the doors along the hallway so that when the mortician came for her, no-one would see.

I never told my co-workers this story. I did not think they would believe me.

The point I am making is this: more than a body, more than a personality, or an ego, you are a divine child of the universe with an eternal spirit.

E-ter-nal.

You come from Source, you exist because of Source, and someday you return to Source.

Critical for your well-being as well as for your endeavors in this journey of creating your reality and learning to become the real you - the divine child of the universe - connecting with your Source is a step you must make on your own.

This is a very personal journey, no man, woman or child can come between you and your Source. Death cannot separate you from your Source.

This Source is the very source of your being. The part of you that does not reside in the physical realm – the part of you that constantly maintains 24 hour access to all things, known and unknown, seen and unseen - stands a mere breath away.

I read somewhere once that "of God" - Spiritos – means to exhale – while man means inhale. How much closer to Source can you get?

Attach yourself to your Source. Give thanks to your Source for the ability to breathe in and out.

Start your day by giving thanks for everything in your life, both the wanted and unwanted.

Give thanks for everything you can see, taste, touch, smell, hear or sense, for without your Source you would not exist.

Step outside, right this minute, whether it is on your porch, your doorstep, your curb, your backyard, your front yard or in the street.

Go outside and look up. Look at the sun or the clouds, the moon and stars and notice everything not made by man. This, in its simplest form, is the divine expression of Source.

And then realize that the Master Of All That propels you, powers you, gives you being on this planet.

The same energy that made the stars made you. The same energy that powers the universe powers you.

Are you any less than one of these?

You are loved.

And you are known.

It is time for you to know yourself.

© 2007 - All rights reserved - you may download and use this article please provide a link back to my website or show my resource box on your site.

Article Source: http://www.newagelivingarticles.com

Laurie Brenner, former managing editor of California's oldest continuously published weekly, now writes for the sheer *joy* of it, her ezine, The View From The Western Slope and for New Age Living Articles to share with you tools and insights for living in this new "quantum age."

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